Scripture calls us not to be ‘double-minded.” James tells us that when we are we’re unstable in all our ways. (James 1:7-8) At the same time Paul bounces back and forth between conviction and joy in Romans 7:21-24.
These days I find myself caught between two poles. We have agreed to leave where we are and serve in a new place, but we are not there yet. I must confess that sometimes I feel very divided or ‘double-minded.’ On one hand there is the sorrow of contemplating relationships that have been rich and enriching for us. We have the sense that God has indeed inhabited some of our relationships and we and they have benefitted and we have grown as followers of Jesus. That feels good. At the same time, contemplating departure also produces pain. There is the pain of pulling up roots. There is also pain of becoming more distant in what have felt like very close relationships. We grieve for those relationships. As our home becomes filled with boxes and the pieces of our lives get put away, there is a certain instability that creeps in. Sometimes I wonder if this part of our life will disappear just like things that are disappearing into boxes. Because of the great people we have met here and shared life with, we don’t want that to happen. Continue reading